South Dakota School of Mines & Technology - Off the Hook

Rare that I say 'off the hook.' Rarer that I blog about a show. However, last night in Rapid City, things got nuts. Like I used to do when reviewing Bon Jovi concerts, let's break it down song by song or segment by segment.

Soundcheck - My student entourage/shadow loved my old stuff before the show - male stripper, milf patrol, stephen lynch stuff. I should learn the old stuff again.

Warmup - Not sure what to make of the crowd, 'attentive' is a word I use for not laughing, but we were feeling each other out. This school is 70% guys and I'd say the show was 1/2 Greek and 1/4 of the crowd was wearing beanies that really looked like big green kippots (jewish hats).

Just Like Quagmire - Usually wins the guys over. They like quagmire and apparently putting the city name before 'crackwhore' in the show.

BonJovi219 (Boy on the Internet) - Usually I put this later, because this is a go to song. The premise - I bring up a guy from the crowd to be the internet boy. In this school of techies, three guys came up - Blake, a perverted freshman who stole or ruined the show by miming masturbation throughout the song, Jake, someone who supervised Blake acting as the voice of reason or just pretending they were stalking online, and Rashan, an Indian student took pictures of me from the stage on his phone only to realize he had a camera so he took 20 pictures of me with his camera throughout the night. Rashan was off on one side while Jake and Blake were on the other. Blake was gross and I think he ticked off some people by being the self-loving addict that he is. It was funny to see the crowd turn on him later in the show like a wrestler who turns heel.

One More Year (The College Song) - I kept Blake on stage, so he was partly my fault but hey, when self-pleasure is in the song, you gotta use the live demo. These two songs had the crowd in my hand. I moved up the college stuff and now it's about maintaining throughout.

Just Being Miley - Two girls being Miley. Cute, held the fort. They were normal. We weren't used to that.

More Than Four - We never guessed my wife's 'number,' but we didn't call our celebs that I would try to impersonate sexing the wife. Ahnold, Morgan Freeman, Billy Cosby, Bill Clinton went off good enough, but they gave me an applause break for Charlie Sheen. Apparently sex with Sheen last two seconds and then he says winning after.

Bruno Mars Madlibs - I started doing this over the summer because I hate the video for 'Just the Way You Are' so much. Do you really need to sing to this gorgeous South American model that she's amazing? Does she really need a self-esteem boost? I think she'll be alright. So instead of 'when I see your face', we subbed in "when I Missy's prostate, you're kinky just the way you are." Also, this crowd was very good at applauding at the end of songs. Usually it's awkward or I haven't earned it. Rashan from the internet bit came up to turn the page for me then we sang the final line together since he liked Bruno Mars.

Oh yeah, during Bruno Mars there was heavy rain or a hailstorm that caused 30% of the crowd to immediately evacuate. So weird, I don't know if this protocol but it felt like I was being punked. A minute later, at least half of the evacuees would return.

Top Ten Things About SDSMT

This student bootlegged the 2nd half of my show. I want this footage. I wish I brought my camera. I hit all the high notes and I didn't know Humans vs Zombies was more popular than uhh... sports.

Entrance Contest

Forgo'd FML contest to get students to come out to their own theme music choosing a random track off a playlist on my iPod. Blake tried to volunteer again, but we booed him off. If he was a wrestler, he got amazing heat from the crowd. They turned on him fast. Rashan tried too, but again, overexposed. A couple girls did alright, Jake returned and came up short again endorsing the winner - Hi - no, that's his name, an Asian student from Triangle Fraternity who basically did the robot with the theme from Seinfeld playing in the background. Big ovation, amazing job.

After the comedy, I do my talk about Greek Life yada yada, and my fly was down during the whole thing yada yada, but Mines was off the hook - great crowd energy, fairly filthy more because of the volunteers than me. And my friend from Black Hills even showed with my photo of me at Mt Rushmore back in 2008 from my BHSU visit. Great job Rapid City!  

www.funnyevan.com

Happy Bye Bye Bin Laden Day / Marathon Recap

Greetings ,

Happy Bye Bye Bin Laden Day!

It's a great day for America and I think it's great that Obama finally enlisted Chuck Norris to get the job done! And yes, it was the fist that came from his beard.

In the spirit of freedom, I want to thank all my "Fight For Kids" supporters for my Long Island training:

The Kahrs Family / Dave Towle / Pam Knell / Sleven Rucci-Airo / Liza Savas / Gina Bratkowsky

I have so far raised over $300 (www.funnyevanmarathon.com), snagged the front page onThe Great Neck News and the back page in The Great Neck Record. 

So what happened in the race?

I ran 1:38:41. I finished 330th of 4605 runners and as I said on twitter, I sprinted that mofo in. That's a 7:37/mile pace.

The dates keep coming in May as tomorrow I return to the Boston area at Bentley University - 7pm in the auditorium.

Thank you again,
Evan

www.funnyevanmarathon.com

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South Africa - Part 2 of 3

About a week into my trip and I have the schedule of a morning show host. I get exhausted at 8 pm and wake up between 4-5 am. I then get up to train in the hotel gym watching The Weakest Link - the perfect show to be British. Anne Robinson is like a bitchy librarian who knows where every fact is and when someone gets eliminated, it's like they fail for not getting being proper/British enough. So with this schedule at least I know I can have Matt Lauer's job someday. Today I woke up a little after 6am and felt like the biggest slacker.



Anyway, you can learn a lot about a culture when you go to the airport. Some harsh realities and retroactive observations:



- Every South African accent sounds British to me.

- Everyone in South Africa is attractive, gorgeous really. All genders, ages, races and sizes.
- Speaking of sizes, there are no fat south africans. The only fat people are the Americans visiting South Africa. It's like the conversion rate in money from US to SA is the same for weight. Obese Americans --> Overweight SAs. Overweight Americans --> Average SA. Average Americans --> SA Supermodels. It's probably funnier to go through that backwards, but just goes to show where our food industry is compared to theirs. Watch Food Inc. And even if you are ugly, at least you're clean-cut.
- Did I mention bottled water is less than a dollar here?
- Did I mention toilets have a smaller, spherical shape than the US? See weight comment.
- Did I mention Neil Diamond was here last night and caused a traffic showdown for the several hours leading up to his show? Didn't know there were Red Sox fans in Cape Town to sing along to 'Sweet Caroline.'
- Oh, and let's talk airport security. In the US it's always a contest to see who can disrobe and redress the fastest. (Old people always lose, followed by people with small children and Asians are the Women's UCONN Basketball team of this tournament. I was all ready to give it an international go, but...

--> As long as you have no metals on you, you're set.



--> Shoes can stay ON!



--> Laptops can stay IN your bag!



--> You CAN bring through WATER! You're no longer bordering on hyponetremia (google it) to gulp all your water down before security.



--> With each of these points, you hate TSA that much more.

- I can't take south africa airport security seriously. Looks like their uniform came from a costume shop or the wardrobe truck on a Hollywood set. And what the hell is a constable? (I'll google it.)

- Stayed at a nice hotel with family and the staff was so nice it bordered on nausea. There's being nice by taking your food order then there's being nice for the sake of worrying they might have you executed for not being nice enough so they're almost ready to bow before you and beg for their lives. Then you have them defeat the Kragen to see if they are truly worthy. (Yep, some Clash of the Titans humor. And there will be a sequel.) We had a new person seat us for breakfast and it was at a table that was used at one of the settings. The new girl said sorry about 15 times, literally. I would have her defeat the Kragen, de-claw a tiger and then walk around downtown Cape Town wearing a placard that reads, "I Hate Nelson Mandela."

- The Botanical Gardens are gorgeous. It's like Alice in Wonderland meets the Land of Oz. You can get right up and small them, photograph them and then Guinea Hens can walk by out of nowhere. On to safari... (which I've already been on for 3 days... pretty life-changing... get ready...)

South African Ramblings

It has been just over 24 hours since I have left the US and arrived in South Africa through Amsterdam. Here are some ramblings and rantings...

- I have no idea what my body clock is. I'm 6 hours ahead of NY and woke up at 6 am local time (midnight US EDT) to workout. I guess when I go safari I have to be up early so I need to keep the schedule of a morning show host. Being a comedian vampire this new schedule is making me become everything I hate.

- Anytime you're flying international and the pilot comes on first in a foreign language you swear you've been hijacked, every time. He could be saying anything. Although this pilot sounded like the bowler who tried to steal Marge from Homer in an early Simpson episode. Then when he gets to the English you feel great relief. "Oh, he said we may have some turbulence and then said thank you for flying with us. So this isn't the long-awaited sequel to Passenger 57."

- I don't care how nice a person you are, I don't care how at peace you are with yourself spiritually, if there is a young kid behind you who wavers between ecstatic squealing and fierce crying, you want to put a bullet in that kid. (Yes, I plan to be a father in the next couple years.)

- Dutch flight attendants are so amazing you'd swear they were fembots.

- Still off a high of seeing Wrestlemania and the return of The Rock, I've thoroughly annoyed my wife with a Rock "Finally... The Rock... has come BACK to [insert current location]." So finally the rock has come back to jfk, amsterdam, cape town, the crown lounge, the bathroom, etc...

- Frequent flyer status got me into the Crown Lounge in Amsterdam. It's the most conservative, boring but perk-filled place in the world. If I wanted to, I could quietly get hammered in 10 minutes and no one would know.

- South African toilets have big flush buttons against the wall.

- My father-in-law has scared everyone into not coming in contact with any tap water even though the hotel says it's fine. So in the gym I had purified water from the tap. If I get dysentery I'll stop. By the way, I only know the word 'dysentery' because of The Oregon Trail.

- The terminology is a little off from ours. Elevators are lifts, 'watch your step' is 'mind your step' so I guess watch TV is 'mind TV.'

- Speaking of TV:
==The hotel said ESPN but there was no ESPN just a loop of Mila Kunis promoting the Book of Eli and Johnny Depp promoting The Tourist. WTF
==There are 4 sports channels and they all show rugby or australian rules football. I don't know which is which. All I know is they have a working labor agreement. Take that, NFL!
==Some american networks in South Africa: Cartoon Network, Discover Channel, Disney Channel, MTV. Sorry, not a BBC or Bloomberg guy.

-Speaking of MTV:
While on the treadmill in the fitness room, the only thing I could tolerate was MTV and they were actually showing videos! Ramblings within ramblings...
++ Britney is back.
++ Still don't get the gay kiss in Katy Perry's Firework.
++ Any background dancing girl in a Chris Brown video should be at least an arm's length away from him. You don't want to catch a 'you remind me of Rihanna' haymaker.
++ Chris Guetta is everywhere. I have no idea who he is, but he's everywhere.
+++ My BIGGEST PEEVE is with Bruno Mars' "Just the Way You Are" video. It's not a powerful message if you're singing you're amazing to a gorgeous Brazilian or mulatto model. Of course she's amazing, she's doesn't need Michael Jackson Lite to tell her that. If you want to make that video mean something, sing you're amazing to someone not gorgeous, female, young and thin. Sing you're amazing to girl who eats ice cream while she watches The Biggest Loser, a gay couple after their reality pilot was turned down by Oxygen or The Situation after he finally realizes he has AIDS. (ripped off the trump roast for that one)

That's all I have for now. I started this my mentioning that I was working out because I run the Long Island Half-Marathon for Fight For Kids on May 1. Please help me fight against child-drugging and support education of alternative handlings by donating at www.funnyevanmarathon.com.

Evan Wecksell has sights on Lycoming College - SunGazette.com | News, Sports, Jobs, Community Information - Williamsport-Sun Gazette

Evan Wecksell has sights on Lycoming College - SunGazette.com | News, Sports, Jobs, Community Information - Williamsport-Sun Gazette

Evan Wecksell's 2011 Re-Run Tour

Comedian Evan Wecksell Announces Second College Tour to Coincide with Marathon Training, Fundraising

Evan Wecksell hits the road literally and figuratively across 7 states for his 2011 Re-Run Tour while fundraising for "Fight for Kids," a youth rights campaign and relaunching www.funnyevanmarathon.com.

Great Neck, NY -- The word "marathon" already had a Greek origin, but Comedian Evan Wecksell, of Theta Chi Fraternity, is adding to it as he once again tours, trains and fundraises all at the same time.

Beginning Saturday, March 26, the guitar-playing comedian who can be seen on E! Television's "30 Outrageous Celebrity Feuds" and VH1's "I Love the 80s," will embark on his 2011 Re-Run Tour.

At press time, the tour takes Wecksell through 7 states, which includes a Big East Tournament style stretch from April 18-22 where he will perform five shows in five days. A majority of the dates will be part of that school's Greek Week, an annual campus tradition where fraternities and sororities celebrate their 'Greek-dom' with a variety of games, competitions and outside speakers.

"Laugh Out Loud with Hillel" kicks off the tour in New York City with an event at Columbia University's Rennert Hall. The Greek Week shows begin on Tuesday, March 29 at the University of Tampa.

"The Tampa Greek community is excited to have Evan come for our annual Greek Week," says Interfraternity Council President Dan Lewin. 

Not only a comedian, Wecksell sometimes adds the speaker title to his Greek performances. His talk, "It's Great to be Greek," which follows his comedy, reveals his Greek Life story and explains how going and being Greek can benefit one as an undergraduate and alumnus.

"Greek Life and especially our local Theta Chi chapter is honored and excited to host Evan," says Tampa's Panhellenic Vice-President Audrey Lindeman."This well-known funny man will bring a change of pace to the mundane events that have been hosted in the past."

On April 21, the tour features a performance of "College The Musical: A Musical About College" at the College of Wooster. Written by Meyersfield and Wecksell, the comedic two-person show features their original songs performed around the story of a freshman girl who goes off to college and experiences the drama of college life. The musical comedy touches on such issues as casual sex, alcoholism and sexually-transmitted diseases. On March 18, the musical showcased at APCA's Northeast College Programming Conference.

What makes this tour different from past ones is that Evan will also once again dedicate time to training for the RXR / TIAA-CREF Long Island Marathon: Festival of Races on May 1. Specifically running the half-marathon, the race is a follow-up to his 2009 New York City Marathon in which he ran 3:37, beating 36,000 of the 43,000 runner field, including celebrity runners Edward Norton, Alanis Morissette and Anthony Edwards.

Long-distance running is no stranger to Wecksell who ran varsity track and cross-country at Great Neck South High School and later on at Tufts University. He also trained extensively for his 2008 appearance on the Sci-Fi reality game show "CHA$E." 

Wecksell will be training while fundraising for "Fight for Kids," a campaign launched by the Citizens Commission on Human Rights (CCHR), a non-profit public benefit organization. The campaign combats the psychiatric over-drugging and labeling of children while educating and offering alternatives for concerned parents. In 2009, Evan raised over $700 for the campaign.

"Long Island, its people and its streets are so dear to my heart," explains Wecksell. "After taking time off following [the] New York [City Marathon], it was time to get back on the horse and once again put in the miles and energy towards Fight For Kids."

The fundraising campaign has already garnered support from Evan's family, friends and fellow artists.

"This is such an important cause," affirms Anthony d'Mattia, also known as Long Island singer/songwriter fIZ. "It is so rewarding to give back and help children."

The day following the race, Evan will return to the stage for a Greek event at Bentley University in Waltham, Massachusetts.

"We look forward to Evan closing out the year and celebrating our Greek seniors," says Bentley's Greek Activities Council President Emily Meltzer. "I can’t imagine a more fun way to end the semester." 

To take his cause online, Evan has re-launched www.funnyevanmarathon.com. In addition, he will be selling his album "LOL" at all shows with a portion of the proceeds benefiting "Fight for Kids."

2011 Re-Run Tour [confirmed dates]

Saturday, March 26 - Columbia University, New York, NY*

Tuesday, March 29 - University of Tampa, Tampa, FL

Thursday, March 31 - Lycoming College, Williamsport, PA

Friday, April 1 - Lehigh University, Bethlehem, PA

Saturday, April 2 - Franklin and Marshall College, Lancaster, PA

Monday, April 4 - Wagner College, Staten Island, NY

Monday, April 18 - Rutgers University, Newark, NJ

Tuesday, April 19 - Rutgers University, Camden, NJ

Wednesday, April 20 - Central Methodist University, Fayette, MO

Thursday, April 21 - College of Wooster, Wooster, OH**

Friday, April 22 - Case Western Reserve University, Cleveland, OH

Monday, May 2 - Bentley University, Waltham, MA

* Hillel Event

** College The Musical

About Evan Wecksell:

Comedian and Singer-Songwriter Evan Wecksell is one of the funniest and most energetic performers to emerge from New York's comedy clubs and musical venues. Often compared to comedic superstars Adam Sandler and Stephen Lynch, Evan's act is a blend of comedy and music that celebrates the college experience, makes fun of relationships, and pays tribute to Miley Cyrus. Recently signed to Uproar Entertainment, his comedy album "LOL" has been played on SiriusXM Satellite Radio and is available on such internet music vendors as iTunes and Amazon. Evan has also appeared on such pop-culture shows as VH1's "I Love the 80s" and E! Television's "30 Most Outrageous Celebrity Feuds." His solo show is represented by DCA Productions at www.dcaproductions.com. "College The Musical" is represented by Cutting Edge Entertainment at www.cuttingedgeentertain.com. For complete tour information, visit www.EvanWecksell.com.

About Fight for Kids:

"Fight For Kids" is a campaign launched by the Citizens Commission on Human Rights (CCHR), a non-profit public benefit organization that has been the most effective international group to help achieve legislative protections against abusive psychiatric treatment and drugging of children. For more information on Fight for Kids, visit www.fightforkids.org, and to assist Evan in his fundraising, visit www.funnyevanmarathon.com.